At long last, pt. 2 of my wall-improvement series is ready. My plan had been to show just a couple of samples from the nature illustration print collection of the NY public library’s Digital Gallery, but, well, there were way too many that I adored.

and so BELOW are just an itty bitty smattering (apologies for the nautical prejudice - it’s just where my interest lies) of the vast collection of archived science/nature book pages scanned and available for purchase (for like $50 and up, depending on size):

Testudo polyphemus. from North American herpetology; or, A description of the reptiles inhabiting the United States. (1842) (omg, TURTLE BELLIES.)

Sixteen Varieties of Gooseberries, from A collection of the most esteemed fruits…with the blossoms and leaves… (1812) (who knew there were so many varieties of gooseberries? not me, that’s for damn sure.)

Himanthalia lorea, from Photographs of British algae: cyanotype impressions. (1843)

Fig. 1. Male Narwal, or Unicorn (15 Ft. in length); Fig. 2. Under side view of the same Narwal; Fig. 3. Lamantin. from American natural history. Part 1.–Mastology (1826)

Sea Anemones from Animate creation; popular edition of our living world, a natural history (1898)

Les Poissons: le Hareng, la Morue, la Baleine from Cabinet du petit naturaliste (1812) (Woodcut = yay)

Ctenophores. from The new natural history (189-?) (Just LOOK at that loverly shade of blue…)

1. Helix antiqua; 2. Helix Coreanica; 3. Helix leucostoma; 4. Helix orientalis; 5. Helix immaculata; 6. Helix caliginosa; 7. Helix decora; 8. Helix densa; 9. Helix plurizonata; 10. Helix canescens; 11. Helix conoidalis. from The zoology of the voyage of H.M.S. Samarang; under the command of Captain Sir Edward Belcher … during the years 1843-46 (1850)

Siren lacertina from North American herpetology; or, A description of the reptiles inhabiting the United States. (1842)

They also have cartography, russian civil war posters, fashion illustration (see below), industrial blueprints, architecture, menus… I just… it’s just so… overwhelming. Go forth, acquire.

from Ladies’ dress shoes of the nineteenth century (published 1900)

Thank you, Yearbook Yourself, for enlightening me that the one missing ingredient in my life-casserole is hairspray:

it’s terrifying, I know.  shhhhhh. there there. we’ll get through this together.

via swissmiss.

I truly hit the Internets jackpot here, my dearlings. but you know what, I’m going to shush-up because, behold! the pictures speak for themselves:

for your consideration, “hair hats“, by japanese artist, nagi noda

please, PLEASE, let this trend catch on.

via designboom.

Dear The Internets:

DISCLAIMER: Prepare yourself for a somewhat-shameless ploy for your hard-earned-money. But this time, I’m not asking you to help me buy a pirate ship or a wax model of myself, it’s for The Good ™, I promise.

On May 31st, I will be participating in a Punch-A-Thon benefit for the Center for Anti-violence Education (CAE)* and I’m a-lookin’ for sponsors and fellow punchers.

It’s like a walk-a-thon, except, instead of getting sponsored by the mile, you get sponsored by the punch (punching into the air, not at a person, and most assuredly nowhere even NEAR a gift donkey). And it will be in sunny prospect park AND there will be snacks AND face-painting AND most importantly of all, I may or may not be wearing a fancy new pair of Chuck Norris ACTION PANTS:

So here’s how it works:

• you can sponsor me by the punch (example: at 5 cents a punch, 500 punches would be $25)
• or you could do a flat sponsorship (even $10 or 15 would rock my socks, just donate online here and reference “meredith & punchathon”)
• or if you live locally and want to participate, download the flier/form here
• OR none-of-the-above, which is totally AOK.
  

Email me for more info.

* CAE is a 34-year-old nonprofit in brooklyn that offers free courses in self defense for survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault, of which I also happen to be on the board of directors. (oooo “board of directors”, faaaancy).

Rare moment of earnesty: I am a craptacular board member. We are supposed to fundraise- that is what a board does. But I am usually too mortified to directly ask my friends for support; I know that many of you are as paycheck-to-paycheck as I am. So anyway, I tossed and turned about whether or not to post this here. I promise that the next post will be whimsical and absurd!

Just because it’s icky outside, doesn’t mean you can’t shoot people.

From Alex Wooley Design: “This unique, funnel shaped umbrella harnesses the flow of rainwater down into its handle, a water pistol. The user can fire at will, maintaining a constant flow of water as long as rain continues to fall.”

Genius.

this is actually fun-umbrella-design post #2 on NSTGD, here’s the first.

And because I love you, and I love the Hollies, and because the Hollies love umbrellas, and because if a = b and b = c then c = a, here is their song “Bus Stop“.

via designboom.

This body modification trend* is in direct competition with face-tattoos, really-big-muscles and objectivism for the #1 position in my “Trying Super Hard to Seem Badass But Instead Making Meredith Giggle Uncontrollably”** list.

Behold! Tooth Tattoos:

(the laughing + teeth theme reminded me of the dental hyenist of my long lost animal-abecedarium project.)

*probably not a trend at all.

**with one exception, the amy winehouse tooth is legitimately frightening:

holy cephalopods! According to Science*, the first 6-footed octopus (hexapus) has been discovered!

now typically, I would be 100% entirely jazzed about this wonderous, cryptozoology-meets-actually-actual-zoology news, but the 1955 Film “It Came from Beneath the Sea“** prophecized that the city of san francisco would be destroyed by a giant hexapus and, frankly, I’m concerned for my left-coast friends.

SF’ers: MOVE INLAND!

And while we are on the topic, I’d like to encourage everyone ever, who reads my blog, to purchase their very own tentacle arm:

*let me be the first to commend the cnn.com copy-editors for properly pluralizing “hexapus” as “hexapuses” and not “hexapi”. also, this quote makes me giggle incessantly:

Octopuses are renowned for having three hearts, blue blood and the ability to alter their skin complexion in the blink of an eye.

heh “renowned”?

**see one of my first blog posts, “Cryptozoology: a film series“, in which this movie could easily fit.

just in case you were wondering, here’s some of what’s been keeping me giggling over the past few days:

number 1: feltidermy

so so so beautiful-bizarre.

number 2: garfield-minus-garfield

basically, if you take out the annoying cat, this comic strip becomes pure, absurd hilarity.. and possibly poignant commentary on suburban isolation. (credit to taylor for sharing)

number 3: unrealized eye-wear fads

including but not limited to the monocle veil:

the nose-shield:

and sun visors:

(credit to -j. for sharing)

I just, well, no. NO.

Kitty Wigs, from kittywigs.com:

If this is somehow an acceptable pet accessory, may I request from the pet-crap-producers of the world some dog monocles? I just think my puppy would look pretty darn swanky if she had a monocle.

as foretold, here are even more eminently purchasable present options:

Beasts on Plates: several months ago, I purchased a shiny-red glass plate with a grizzly bear etched into it from etsy seller “mountain gold“, and I have just discovered that they also have a MOOSE plate! so if you bought this plate we would be fraternal plate-twins. we could start the “large furry beasts of the tundra on plates” club and meet monthly. I’m just sayin’:

DIY Gifts:

A. Print-on-Demand: with the plethora* of print-on-demand, self-publishing services out there today, you can design your own loot and get it made without having to buy in bulk quantities to make it affordable. on lulu.com, you can publish your own books, calendars, posters etc. I’m partial to the photobook “modern theme” option (this year, I printed a 25-page hardback photo-album, of equal quality to anything you might find on the B&N discount book display near the registers, for me mum). OR! on cafepress.com, there are ever-so-very-many ridiculous products onto which you can slap your image/design (think dog-shirts, truckers hats, onesies, throw pillows, as well as tshirts/bags/etc). I gave my darlingest friend edwina, buttons with her manfriend’s face on them:

also, look! a donkey thong!

B. Terrariums! I have recently become enamored of these little jars of botanical-whimsy. Just find a fish bowl or a vintage jar (here or here or here), and get some succulent plant life (here), and maybe go nuts and put little plastic dinosaurs in it, or a donkey (as seen below)…

Eggpants: I know I know, I’ve talked about these before, but seriously, just look at them, everyone should own these. everyone ever.

==UPDATE==
Conjoined Triplets Finger Puppet & Huggable Prescriptions: I sometimes forget just how talented-meets-bizarre many of my friends are… these plush-tastic toys are by claire-darling and can be found in her etsy-shop.

*“would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?” …you know what, forget everything I’ve said, just buy everyone you know a copy of the three amigos on dvd.

“Manually deployed similar to a parachute, the 150-liter shield inflates in less than three seconds and deflates after 90 seconds. Should you get buried, when the bag deflates you’ll at least have a small air pocket to breathe, scream and hope to be found.”

you know, just in case. I’d feel mighty bad if one of you died in an avalanche and I had decided *not* to post about this.

buy here.

via coolhunting

dear friends with wombs,

I would like submit the following evidence in favor of breeding:

thank you,

meredith

(via rarebirdfinds)

I promise with my heart that this will be the last ‘baby-things’ post for a while, but holy smelly-baby-poo, I am actually considering poking holes in my friends-who-are-couples’ condoms just so I have an excuse to buy these*:

*the viking hats, not the little poo-machines, however cute they may be.

because you never know when you might need to take a nap. you can wear your pillow wig alone…

….or in a group.

Designed by Joo Youn Paek, who also created the ‘polite umbrella’:

(watch the video)

Ever-a-fan-of-themed-dining, I am particularly ensorcelled by Japanese artist/gore+food-enthusiast, Nagi Noda’s “Horror Cafe” exhibition in Tokyo:

I’m not sure which I love more, the coffin dresses, or the looks on their faces:

mmmm.. gore-food.

*I’m still giggling that I got to use the word “ensorcelled”. hehe. ensorcelled. yes, I am a nerd.