Comments on: I am a super sleuth.

By: neverslapthegiftdonkey » Blog Archive » sasquatch on mars? don't be so sure...

Wed, 30 Jan 2008 17:09:29 +0000

[...] amateur CSI-viewer talents, super-sleuth-skills and Science ™ in tow, I felt it necessary to zoom in closer, only to discover that, no, it is [...]

By: Tiffany

Tiffany — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 22:03:02 +0000

That would be *yesterday*, not yeserday. Although I may have been saying ‘yes’ all day.

By: Tiffany

Tiffany — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 22:02:11 +0000

I used it yeserday. Best.Usable.Art.Ever.

By: meredith

meredith — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 18:05:23 +0000

tiffany: I spent an extra $0.004 dollars on your wallet… because you are so special!

By: Tiffany

Tiffany — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 16:38:58 +0000

McLovin.

By: Tiffany

Tiffany — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 16:38:32 +0000

Comment #4. This was the first thing I ever read on your blog and I thought it was fantastic. But after meeting you it kind of lost it’s lustre and now I think it’s really just kind of crappy. [juuuust kidding]

And THANKS for the wallet. And all of it’s extra tape. It is really on of the coolest presents *ever*!

By: Calamity J

Calamity J — Thu, 02 Aug 2007 18:42:27 +0000

There are several flaws in your plan. Namely, on the physical structures of the pool and the water itself. Firstly, the water. Water sloshes. Even if you were 36 strong ballet or Qi Gong men, the water would probably splash as you attempted to maneuver the pool away to the farm. Especially when picking up the pool. Secondly, you presume that the bottom of the pool is flat and solid. I bet the bottom of that pool was all platic and floppy. Floppy bottomed pools would bulge in the middle when the 36 men try to pick it up. It would be difficult to have some of the 36 men hold the edges while the rest moved to the middle and squatted or laid on their backs or some other un-ergonomic position to lift the bulge. I think that the bottom of the pool would stretch in some weird ways, esp if the men managed to get the pool up into the air. Would some of the men have to walk under the pool to support the said bulge? Perhaps some of these men were short statured? At any rate, I have an alternate proposal: A bunch of people who happened to be on antipsychotic drugs wander into this person’s back yard. The antipsychotics make these people thirsty. One in the party begins drinking, and then another, and then another. There is, in fact, a parade of thirsty individuals on antipsychotics. They are all in a cult and out for a leisurely walk. These fine people are in a cult that stresses silence, so the neighbors don’t really hear them coming. Now, we all know that chlorine has a synergestic effect on some classes of antipsychotic medications. What this means is that a whole shitload of brain chemicals get put out that impair reasoning and make you really happy. Also, chlorine’s threshold of toxicity gets lowered. The happy individuals drink more and more water because they are happy and their judgement is impaired and they can’t tell when their bladders are full. Eventually, though they one by one quietly wander off and die of chlorine poisoning. More quiet cult members come along and drink more and more chlorine. At the end of the line of this procession is the quiet cultmaster and a few stragglers. The cultmaster is thirsty but alas the water is gone. The cultmaster and stragglers notice the bodies in the front yard and they panic, but quietly so. The cultmaster calls some discreetly disguised and rather quiet mondo cultcabs. They wrap the first batch of dead cultfolk in the pool, like a tarp. The rest just get thrown in the other cultmobiles.

This, I tell you, is how it all went down.

By: Run

Run — Mon, 30 Jul 2007 19:17:50 +0000

Truly, your intellect knows no boundary. I think you personally need to stop them, because this is obviously a plot of James Bond villainesque proportions.

By: -j.

-j. — Sun, 29 Jul 2007 18:46:12 +0000

Nancy Drew and the Case of the AWESOME. You really need your own detective show with a comically mismatched partner.