c is for clambulance driver
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I’m not sure I will be able to offer a suitable explanation for the following. It just is. accept it. move on.
I may or may not continue to finish the entire alphabet.
The Full List of Animals/Professions*:
| Aardvarchitect | Flealance writer | Police Insector |
| Account-anteater | Flealancer | POPErregrin falcon |
| adminnowstrative assistant | For-tuna teller | Porcu e-taster |
| Air Traffic ConPolar Bear | Four Starfish General | porn star-fish |
| Albatrossing Guard | Gazellectrician | Prawncologist |
| Alligattorney | geoncologist | presidANT |
| alpacab driver | Gerbill collector | PresRodent of the Ewe-mite-d Skates |
| Anchormanchovy | Giraffestrophysicist | Prime ministurgeon |
| Anemoneurologist | Giraffic cop | prison gaardvark |
| anemoney launderer | Gnuclear Physicist | Produserpent |
| Anes-flea-siologist | Gnumerologists | professaurus rex |
| Anteloperator | goat-go dancer | Professor of Simiantics |
| Archeoctopus | Governearthworm | Prostiturtle |
| Astrologerbil | Grasshopperator | Psykoalagist |
| Astronautilus | Guarantortoise | PteridacToll Collector |
| Bail Gibbondsman | Guidance Coun-seal-er | Pubelk Speaker |
| Barristercuda | guppyANIST | Public Squirrelations Agent |
| Basenjineer | gynecolfish | Publice Squirrealations Consultantlion |
| basketball croach | Haberdashrew | racoonteur |
| Black Mambartender | Hammerheadmaster | Racoonvict |
| Boa Constractor | Hamsturgeon | ratiographer |
| Boar-to-boar salesman | Hareathon Runner | raventure capitalist |
| Bonobobstetrician | haredresser | Real Esnake Agent |
| Brigasteer General | Hareticulturist | Reporturtle |
| Brontostore Clerk | hedgehog fund manager | Research Develemur |
| Budgerigardener | hippodiatrist | Rhinocerosteopath |
| Buffalawyer | hippopotamusician | Rodentist |
| Bus Boyster | Homemako | Rottwelders |
| Butlerfly | homeopossumy | Safety Terra nspector |
| camelraman | House monkeeper | sailORCA |
| Capybarrister | humanatee | Salamanwhore |
| Card-eel-ologist | Iguanalyst | Salesmanatee |
| Caribookkeeper | illEAGLE immigrant | Salmonsignor |
| Caributician | Jaguarundertaker | Scarabus Driver |
| Carpentermite | Janitoragutan | Sea cucombudsman |
| Catererpillar | kangarheumatologist | Sea Urchinvironmentalist |
| Centipediatrician | Kangaroofer | Sealion Tamer |
| Cephalopodiatrist | Kangarool Bus Driver | secRATary |
| chameleonnaire | Kangarouseabout | Securities annelidst |
| Chemistallion | Kelp-desk technician | seminarianteater |
| Chihuahuarden | kittengineer | Sharchivist |
| Chilean Sea Bassassin | Kodiakademic | Shark Ranger |
| Chimney Sheep | Kommissardine | sharkitecht |
| chinchillacal laboratory scientist | Krillustrator | Shop Stewaardvark |
| Chipmonk | Lambassador | Shrewaiter |
| Chordata-base administrator | Libearian | Snails Associate |
| Cicaddy | Lice-president of sales | softshellcrabware developer |
| Clambulance driver | Liontrepeneur | Soliciturkey |
| coal MINXer | lobsternographer | Squideogame designer |
| coelacanthropologist | Lobsterraformer | Stagistician |
| Coelacantountant | Locustomer Service Representative | Sting Radiologist |
| Coelocanthropologist | Lumberjackass | Stingrave-digger |
| Commodorca | Lute-fiskal analyst | Stork broker |
| computer crowgrammer | lynxguistics analizard | Sturgeon General |
| Condor-to-door salesman | Macaquetuary | Super Modeel |
| COO: Chief Otterating Officer | mafia donkey | superviper |
| Cook-aburra | Magpiegazine Editor | tadpole dancer |
| Cook-koo | managing direcTORTOISE | tadpolitician |
| Cougastroenterologist | Man-o-war profiteer | TAIPAiNter |
| cowbOYSTER | Marapython Runner | TAP DANCERpent |
| cowtotechnology | Marriage Cownsuler | Telephant operator |
| Crabbi | Martial Arts Mouster | Thylacenester |
| Cygnus Analyst | Matadormouse | Tick Support |
| Dance Coweographer | Mechanichthyosaur | Ticknician |
| Deerlivery person | Mercanary | Tila anist |
| Defense Otterney | molluscULPTOR | Toad Truck Driver |
| dental hyenist | Narwhalchemist | TOREAdormouse |
| Dimetrorthodonist | Newt Reporter | TouCantor |
| Disci-planarian? | Night-watchmongoose | Trilobicameral Legislator |
| Doberman n-sheriff | Notary cub-lic | Troutlaw |
| Dock-shund Worker | ocelottery ticket agent | turbIT CONSULTANT |
| Doctopus | Octometrist | TURBOTanist |
| Dodoorman | orangatANGLER | Turkeynote speaker |
| Dolphinancier | Orcartographer | Turtelemarketer |
| Dovernment worker | orcastra conducktor | Unicornithologist |
| Dromedairy Farmer | Osteocephelapod | Urialtaker |
| Echidanpper | ostrichrician | Velociraptour Guide |
| EconoMusk-ox | Otterlaryngologist | Vermintern |
| Editortoise-in-Chief | oWRANGLERtang | Vipersonal Trainer |
| Eland-scaper | Pachydermatologist | Vole-unteer |
| Emunitions expert | Pangolinguist | Vulturch minister |
| Engideer | Parak-etiologist | Weaselectrician |
| Engineerotang | paralegull | whalder |
| Exotic Pandancer | Park rangiraffe | Wildebeekeeper |
| Exotick Dancer | Peacocktail waitress | Wormongerer |
| Exterminatermite | Pelicandscaper | Yaktor |
| Ex-termite-ator | Pharmoset! | Yaktuary |
| Fireflibrarian | Photo-tern-alist | Yeomanatee |
| fireMANDRILL | Plumeerkat | Yogoat Instructor |
| fleabotomist | Plumermaid | zeburgler |
*This list was compiled with the help of 15 or so friends who devoted the majority of their workday in support of this noble (nobull?) endeavor.
UPDATE! Join the movement, draw your own.
Oh.
My.
God.
I think I just overdosed on awesome. That psykoalagist may be the most amazing thing I’ve seen ever.
meredith,
for this, i’m seriously going to marry you. and i am not gay. but i am now.
yours,
edwina
*big smiles*
you are silly and amazing.
silly, yes. amazing? if by “amazing” you mean, “spends her work hours making ridiculous photoshop images of animal puns for the internets”, then yes, thank you!
oh my yay!
can we get enough people to do create them all for the halloween parade? i want to meet the sharkitecht.
rachelle - omilord that would be amazing. I’m totally in.
When this becomes a children’s book, I will buy it and marry it.
Then I make sweet love to you.
Wow, I just creeped myself out.
Oh dear
none of your lip, storytime… NONE OF IT.
Seriously. I’m proud of you. And everyone involved.
thank you for your many contributions, tyler-dear!
Quite possibly the most entertaining thing on the internet right now.
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