10 arguments in favor of purchasing a home fog machine
1) to achieve that ephemeral “instant-haunted-house” effect.
2) to quickly hide a dirty floor when you have surprise guests.
3) as a theft-deterrent:
burglar 1: “see anything worth stealing?”
burglar 2: “naaah, just a bunch of fog in there.”
4) humidity does wonders for the respiratory system.
5) it would be endlessly amusing to watch my puppy navigate the apartment… imagine a body-less tail rising from the fog… hiLARious.
6) no more wrinkles on linens.
7) to get out of bad dates:
baddateguy: “sooo how do you like your eggs in the morning… heh heh.”
me-after-secretly-switching-on-the-fog: “ohhh no! my house is filling up with fog! I have to call my landlord! time for you to go.”
8.) my grandmother always used to say “keep halloween with you, all through the year”.
9) to set the mood during my monthly daughters-of-the-vietman-war meetings.
10) well, if I don’t buy the fog machine, I will probably have to return my in-home-lighthouse.
buy at target:
Of course, one must question why you had baddateguy in your house in the first place. I was imagining the bad date at a restaurant. suddenly there is a cloud of fog, and when it clears, YOU ARE GONE! (That means you carry your fog machine around with you at all times.)
mace, that is pure genius.
i bet we could come up with 10 more reasons to buy a portable fog-machine.
There are no arguments against this.
That’s all well and good until your neighbours start to complain about the foghorn.
It’s all fun and games until your neighbor thinks that you are CONSTANTLY high.
Oh! And don’t forget our comedy film wherein a tiny, vicious dog jumps out from the fog and bites someone, either in the crotch or the butt.
Having been a proud owner for the past 5 years, I wouldn’t leave home without mine. Nothing says Boo, like a good fog.
I was gonna say that it would make life more like a Nintendo 64 game, but this is the wrong crowd for that.
Instead, I say only this: Instant San Francisco simulator.
AHHH! Hi mom!!!! (MsP)
meredith, you are a genius, and i am going to use your fog machine to steal all the chocolate from the oompa loompas at jacques torres’ chocolate factory. (i will be wearing my oompa loompa costume so i’ll blend in)
Use the right lighting and you can have your own film noir set. You can look like a soft focus 40’s era starlet with perfect skin 24/7!
yet ANOTHER delightful idea. there are truly no reasons in the world not to get a home fog machine.